What do computers snack on? For MomJunction, she covers literature and information/ facts articles for kids. A late boomer. What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? So the Air Force guy pops open his trunk and finds a full, unopened bottle of Jack Daniels. Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license. What book won't teachers give you credit for reading? Because they take too long to iron! What do you call a pile of kittens? A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun. What do you call dinner theatre in a high school cafeteria? How did the hipsters mouth burn? How do you know that the driver driving toward you is a physicist? Parents when I was 5: Go to your room. But on the upside, he makes great fries. What happened with Dracula met a snowman? Kids will laugh out loud when they hear these jokes about car! Why did Harry Potter suddenly go bald in his teens? Why did the period tell the comma to stop? Students. Goat to the store and pick up some bread. 4. Or if youre parents of teenagers, post them on Instagram and Facebook! A bald eagle! Because theyre extinct. He looks at his twisted car and says, "Man, I am really lucky to be alive!" Mother Nature is providential. Ten-tickles, 57. But you didn't like it! In the mainstream. 20 Hilarious Driving Quotes 1 Don't be a wimp. Now Im an angsty adult. A mushroom! I was looking for the lightning when it struck me. Why should you never trust a pig with a secret? Otherwise I would have died without it.. Its hard to make friends. What did baby corn ask mumma corn? 13. I have two friends, an astronaut, and a truck driver. What did the French teacher say to the class? Are you aware of the kidnapping that happened at school? Anybody home? Why do cows wear bells around their necks . Whats the dumbest animal in the jungle? Between the Disney movies about talking vehicles and how much time they spend in their car seat, its no wonder your tike is obsessed. What can you catch but not throw? I hate people who use big words just to make themselves look perspicacious. Officer : I seeCan I see your vehicle registration papers please. January graduated with an English and Literature degree from Columbia University. It was a soft drink. 79. These 101 Cow Jokes Are Udderly Hilarious. So the blonde looks out the window and says, "Yes. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. What did the chef say to make the raw potato laugh? You have brought your grades up, you've studied your Bible diligently, but you didn't get hair cut!" A: Heavy psychedelics. (1) In 2017, 24 percent of 15- to 20-year-old drivers who were killed in crashes had a blood alcohol concentration (BAC) of .08g/dL or higher. Sravani holds a post-graduate degree in Biotechnology from SRM University, Chennai. Turns out he was just telling me he approved of my driving. You know Samson had long hair, Moses had long hair, Noah had long hair, and even Jesus had long hair." Why did theboyrun around his bed? Because she was a little horse! ~Dorothy Parker Teenagers have a great sense of humor. What kind of people like snails? Why did the teacher put on sunglasses? What did the duck say when he bought lipstick? My teachers told me Id never amount to much because I procrastinate so much. Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! 2 Don't day dream while driving if you really want to be back home. What happens to a frogs car when it breaks down? 2. Why couldnt the teacher control her pupils? Related: Here are the 150 Best Corny Dad Jokes Ever! You can even use them to impress boys or girls youre crushing on! Why do bees have sticky hair? Even your dog can sense the danger ahead hahaha. Whether you're the keynote speaker at a teen-oriented convention, a teacher in a high school, or just somebody looking for a way to entertain, you may be thinking the following: "I need some funny jokes or riddles for teenagers." last saved 2022 Sep 18 Reali-tea. It was framed. Older Woman: Murdered the owner? Server responsed at: 03/01/2023 9:59 p.m. All texts are contributed by our excellent writers. What do you call a 60-year-old who hasnt reached puberty? The cop smelled alcohol on the priest's breath and saw an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car. Give a cold cow a pogo stick. How do you know that you have a teenager in your house? Quaranteens. Highest afl attendance ever no : Don't day dream while driving if you really want to be back home. Most of California has never seen a white Christmas. How does NASA organize a party? Because there were lots of knights. Because they keep breaking out, 51. ~Raymond Duncan, unverified Beer. With so many riddles and jokes in cyberspace, settling on a theme will help you narrow your selections. Why cant you trust an atom? In the middle of the night with no other cars on the road they hit each other head on and both cars go flying off in different directions. The Air Force guy thinks for a moment and says, "You know, you're absolutely right! Did you hear about the mathematician whos afraid of negative numbers? Whats the difference between ignorance and apathy? ~Erma Bombeck In the good old days, when a teen-ager went into the garage, he came out with a lawnmower. Why do kangaroo moms not like rain? With the rise of self-driving vehicles, it is also a matter of time before there is a country song where the guy's trucks leave him. Why are ghosts bad liars? Six Tips to Know When Calling AAA for Road Service, Relocating? Why do rappers need umbrellas? Pearis. I thought my neighbors were lovely people. Different people take different time period to learn driving. Best Jokes For Teens Giphy What kind of fighter never uses his fist, but his weapons are delicious? Then it's a whole different story. Some kids told me they'd give me $20 to hang out with them. What is the witchs favorite school subject? His father said to him, "I'll make a deal with you. Airplane 18 Boat 13 Bus 8 Car 27 Motorcycle 16 Road 34 Train 20 Vehicle 7 1 2 Showing jokes 1 to 15 of 27 car jokes for kids He says to her, "You're the second pregnant lady I've pulled out of the ditch today.". He swore he did his homework. What has one eye, but cant see? What is orange and red and full of disappointment? He asked his father, who was a minister, if they could discuss his use of the car. Last time they were visiting, he got pulled over by a cop and, in the middle of getting the ticket, politely disagreed and drove away. Girls: Right, God created a rough copy before the final one. He looks quite puzzled. How do all the oceans say hello to each other? 14. Why did the elephant paint himself different colors? The class was too bright. The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. ~Philip Guedalla, as quoted in The Reader's Digest, 1936 ~Italian proverb 21. Are you aware of the "kidnapping" that happened at school? What you Need to know About the Front License Plate. A walking debt, 53. 2010 The Thought & Expression Company, LLC. Why couldn't the teacher control her pupils? Driving down the highway, I saw my blinker was on. "Do you see any cops following us?" The blonde turns around. The Court. Jump! Your head hits the ceiling! 34. Why do teenagers always travel in a group of three? "I'll bet you're back there to get a change of scenery after . A cement mixer and a prison bus crashed on the highway. My high school bully still takes my lunch money. 2002-2023 LoveToKnow Media. What kind of music do balloons hate? 2. What do you call a dog that can tell time? Go over there and tell him to use a sponge instead.. A stick, 8. ~Author unknown Fo' drizzle. 23. Jokes About Teenage Drivers. What are the security guards outside Samsung stores called? Who let the dogs out? What did one hat say to the other? I tried writing with a broken pencil, but it was pointless. What do you call a slender cow? Git along, little doggies. Before you present your jokes and riddles at an upcoming event, try them out on a few teens - either your own children or someone else's and keep the following in mind. The young man waited a moment and replied, "You know Dad, I've been thinking about that. They dont have the right koalafications. Because they cant even. Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. The officer snaps open the clutch purse and examines the license. 26. What do a coder and a plant have in common? Put it on my bill.. Then it hit me. The blonde turns around again. "The data-driven . Sneakers. What kind of hair does the ocean have? 67. Where do the fruits go on vacation? Hardbacks? asked the shopkeeper.Yes, I replied. Tell all your friends these funny jokes for teens. Did you hear about the kidnapping on the bus? It was a soft drink. Then they went and put a password on their wi-fi. Guardians of the Galaxy. A stamp, 24. He says to the Army guy, "I think this is another sign from God that we should toast to our new found understanding and friendship" 87 car jokes that will drive you crazy. 1. There's nothing left, but fortunately we are unhurt. How does the big flower greet the little one? I had no idea how long it had been on for. Older woman: Is there a problem sir? If two science teachers go to a bar, where do they sit? 41. Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? How do you know if theres an elephant under your bed? 3. The husband replies, "he wants to see your driver's license." A cold! ", A priest was driving down the road one day when getting stopped by a cop. Facebook. ~Bob Phillips, unverified Find out why NFL cheerleaders do or don't receive Super Bowl rings after a big win. By hitting the paws button! Expla-nation, 32. That's why only the best jokes will make them laugh out loud. Because they sit next to their fans. The woman continued, "And look at this, here's another miracle. Looking for a quick one liner to get a laugh. 13. What did the tomato say to the ketchup bottle? Go straight for the Juggalo. Because he wanted to see time fly! The officer tells the couple that he remembered the town because he had the worst sexual experience of his life there. ~Larry Lujack, as quoted in Robert Byrne, The Fifth and Far Finer than the First Four 637 Best Things Anybody Ever Said, 1993 How things go with a learning or new driver, lets see with our list of funny quotes about new drivers. Officer: You what? Whats a balloons least favorite type of music? I used to be addicted to not showering. She looks at her husband and asks, "What did he say?" Because he was trying to catch up on sleep. Q: What did one wall say to the other wall? A corn field. You can at least negotiate with a terrorist. Here are some more funny jokes that you can tell all the other teens! Microchips, 90. Whether youre raising a teen or are a teenager yourself, you can connect with others by making them laugh! Juno. How do wicked chickens reproduce? Make me one with everything. ", A police officer pulls over an elderly female for speeding while driving her husband to a doctors appointment. SWAG. Officer: Why not? Why is it always windy in the sports stadium? No. Santa Jaws! Have stopped at eleven! Feyonc. She: I am expensive every day. Because it has a silent pee. 28. She has nothing against people of that age; indeed, she is quite foolishly fond of some such individuals. What did the zero say to the eight? 29. Blonde Rides Shotgun: Wife: "Poor kid! If you want to make another teen laugh with a funny comment, here are some of the most hilarious jokes you can tell! Here are some of the best knock-knock jokes that will help you share a hearty laugh with teenagers. 64. *You have mixed feelings when you see an opening in rush hour traffic. 3 Nothing's more dangerous than a crazed wife. Nothing; it just gave some wine. Name that thing that stays in the corner but travels the world? What is the best day to go to the beach? Why does no one make friends with Dracula? One letter. When the grape was pinched, what did it say? Why did the gum cross the road? What do you call an old snowman? Look for fresh prints. So he could hide in the crayon box! Kids dont eat broccoli! This article was originally published on Dec. 6, 2019, 150+ Family Instagram Captions To Capture Special Moments With Your Crew, A Mom's Hilarious Review Of Her Dad Watching Her Son Is Going Viral. Why do teenage girls travel in odd-numbered groups? It is not teenagers whom she wishes to abolish, but only the category. Try some from the collection below! Woman: Lost it 4 times for drunk driving. *Traffic is always heavy in both directions. What animal needs to wear a wig? Teenage Drivers cartoons and comics 17 results There's nothing like the freedom of the open road.until you realize that the driver next to you is a teenager. What do you call an old snowman? *Traffic is so bad nowadays, a pedestrian is someone in a hurry. What did the mime say to his audience? Accidents do not happen they are caused. 3. My new thesaurus is terrible. What has a ton of ears but cant hear a thing? If a chemistry and biology teacher go to a bar, where do they sit? That doesnt sound so bad. What kind of haircuts do bees get? It was tense! 94. What is a group of hiking US college students called? My sweetheart is always taking health food crazes too far. One day, bob picks up a hitchhiking priest. Founded in 2010, Thought Catalog is owned and operated by The Thought & Expression Company, Inc. For over a decade, we've been at the bleeding edge of media, pioneering an infrastructure for creatives to flourish both artistically and financially. He won the no-bell prize. Knowing that it is just half the worm and half the apple, 50. Being an avid reader, she keeps herself up to date with research. Pop. To sing, Hello from the other side!. I dont know, and I dont care. Officer2 : Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner. What was a message given by a calculator to the student? You wake him up. Tropical depression, 86. Quit picking on me! You wake him up. What is red, orange and full of disappointment? Dad jokes are excellent for all circumstances because there will be some reaction, it may be a groan, chuckle, or vomit. You crack me up. 17. Whos there? We've got some funny ones that your kids will love! The invention of the teenager was a mistake, in Miss Manners' opinion. What falls in winter but never gets hurt? "And the tires were on it then? Students What's the difference between the ACT and SAT? How do basketball players always stay cool? My car is She couldn't find her glasses. What do you do if there is a kidnapping at high school? A: The color. The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk. Teenage Driver on Jan 22, 2021 Published in Jokes Subscribe I decided to stop worrying about my teenage son's driving and take advantage of it. How can a dog stop the video? Why dont koalas count as bears? Lost it 4 times for drunk driving Id never amount to much because I so! The priest 's breath and saw an empty wine bottle on the highway Rides:... Groan, chuckle, or vomit Poor kid hour traffic a great sense of humor a! 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Make them laugh out loud when they hear these jokes about car did Harry Potter suddenly bald... Was a mistake, in Miss Manners ' opinion biology teacher go to a doctors.... Another miracle ; indeed, she is quite foolishly fond of some individuals! January graduated with an English and literature degree from Columbia University Ma'am, could you step out of vehicle! `` he wants to see your driver 's license. different story six Tips to know about Front... They sit will help you narrow your selections does the big flower greet little! Rides Shotgun: Wife: & quot ; that happened at school know Samson had long hair, and plant...